Friends! I have a special blog post for you today written by Blake Daniels. Blake has just become the best man for his younger brother and was interested in sharing some male perspective!
I never thought the day would come, but my little brother – my best friend throughout my childhood – is finally engaged!
He proposed to his long-time girlfriend on a beach in Mexico (at sunset!) a couple weeks ago. I have been a groomsman before but never the best man. Understandably, I’ve already got some anxiety! I want this to be the most special day of his life. I reached out to my friend Rob, and had a long phone call with my dad to see if they had any tips to share with me. This is what I’ve learned.
1. Plan and Practice Your Speech Until You Can Do it in Your Sleep
The day-of will be high-energy, high-stress, and it will probably involve some alcohol before it’s time for you to make your speech. You should know every joke, every funny story, and every touching complement inside and out. Practice the speech in front of numerous people – the bridal party, your mother and father, and the groom’s friends, just to make sure you won’t unintentionally offend anyone. If you see happy tears, that’s generally a good sign!
Generally, you want to remember two things about delivering your speech:
Come across as genuine (don’t put on a fake ego for the day, don’t use props or anything to distract from what you’re saying), speak loudly and clearly, and allow some pauses for audience laughter and reactions. Better yet, react along with them!
While we’re on the subject of speeches, it’s also your job to help the groom prepare his speech. Let him practice on you as many times as it takes for him to be at ease, and provide him with your most honest feedback. If he’s saying something that will make the old ladies at the reception uncomfortable, he needs to know.
2. You’re Essentially a Babysitter With More Responsibility
It falls on you to help the rest of the groomsmen make their travel and hotel arrangements for the big day, get all their necessary ties and jackets and matching apparel together, and organize if you’re planning to present the bride and groom with a meaningful gift (outside of the wedding registry) as a group.
You also need to pay close attention during all the planning and rehearsal sessions so you can play host the day of the wedding. This means helping people find their seats at the reception, bringing the band or DJ water regularly, mingling with both families to introduce yourself, and be the liaison to the wedding planner on the day of the wedding, so the bride and groom can relax and enjoy the wedding.
3. Eye on the Prize
You have two main objectives. Keep track of the rings, and present them at the correct time. You should assist the groom to ensure he makes it to the wedding venue with all the following conditions met: he should well-rested after a long night’s sleep, on time to start the ceremony, sober, fed and watered in preparation for a long day, and wearing what he’s supposed to be wearing. If you have ensured these things occur, points for you – you’re already halfway there!
Remember to relax a little and enjoy the party, as long as you’re still in complete control of yourself and can respond to needs when necessary. Most importantly take the time to reflect on what a special day it is and make sure to enjoy the occasion.
Do you have any best man tips you can share with Blake? Leave a comment if you do!